Don Ignacio's Music Reviews

Measure of a Man 2003 ★½

Invisible • I Will Carry You • The Way • When You Say You Love Me • No More Sad Songs • Run to Me • Shine • I Survived You • This Is the Night • Perfect Day • Measure of a Man • Touch

Not ear poison, but there are very few moments on this disc that I can do anything more than tolerate. Clay Aiken, for those who don’t remember the early-2000s reality-TV ecosystem, was the runner-up on American Idol, though he probably ended up more famous than the person who beat him, Ruben “Sandwich” Studdard. Aiken was praised widely for his vocal ability and friendly public image. The friendly part, I get. The voice, eh. Technically quite good. He could hit those big notes with some finesse, but I don’t pick up much heft or soul. Empty calories. Then again, the vocals match the songs. Not that this should surprise anyone. This is basic adult-contemporary pop, polished for people flocking to buy CDs at Wal-Mart because they liked the guy on TV. The best of the album is “When You Say You Love Me,” a nice, straight-ahead pop-rock song with a fitfully catchy vocal melody. But even at its best, the album gives me nothing I can really latch onto, and nothing I particularly care to hear again. Another mid-tempo pop tune, “Touch,” is not horrible, though it could have used a more pronounced chorus. By far the worst things here are the ballads, which, for lack of a better description, are horribly dull. That holds true even though Aiken sings to the stars in “This Is the Night.” Plenty of ruckus there, but I doubt it made the stars perk up.

Merry Christmas with Love 2004 ★½

Joy to the World • O Come All Ye Faithful • Winter Wonderland • Silent Night • Hark! The Herald Angels Sing • Merry Christmas with Love • What Are You Doing New Year's Eve? • Sleigh Ride • Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas • Mary, Did You Know? • Don't Save It All for Christmas Day • The Christmas Song • O Holy Night

Super-polished, super-cheery album filled to the brim with Christmas standards. It’s easy to listen to, easily digestible, put together well enough that I don’t have much to complain about beyond the inner Grinch that surfaces every time I review one of these things. Hark, I hear these songs too much now. Fa la la la la… I like “O Holy Night,” though. One of the very few Christmas songs I can still enjoy. He doesn’t eviscerate it here. You wouldn’t expect anything less. He gives it his darndest effort, and I rather enjoy hearing him sing it, darn it. The rest brings cheery, glittery, fake-snow-at-the-mall renditions of “Winter Wonderland,” “Silent Night,” “O Come All Ye Faithful,” “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas,” “Joy to the World,” “The Christmas Song (Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire),” and “Sleigh Ride.” A few of these are less-known covers of more contemporary songs, which, perhaps not too amazingly, are far worse than the songs I’m already sick of hearing. “Mary, Did You Know?” is some godawful church song. The title track is a dismally orchestrated thing about a lonely woman at Christmas who gets cheered up by carolers. “Don’t Save It All for Christmas Day” was co-written by Céline Dion, but it’s not nearly as terrible as that title track. Nice going, earth mommy.

A Thousand Different Ways 2006 ★★

Right Here Waiting • Lonely No More • Without You • Every Time You Go Away • Sorry Seems to Be the Hardest Word • When I See You Smile • Because You Loved Me • I Want to Know What Love Is • These Open Arms • Everything I Do (I Do It for You) • Here You Come Again • Broken Wings • When I Need You • Everything I Have

More Clay Aiken, and mostly a covers album, though this one is helped by tasteful production and a few decent song choices: Badfinger’s “Without You” and Elton John’s “Sorry Seems to Be the Hardest Word.” It’s also dragged down by some pretty awful choices: Bad English’s “When I See You Smile,” Jon Bon Jovi’s “These Open Arms,” and Céline Dion’s “Because You Loved Me.” Then there are the merely uninspired picks: Foreigner’s “I Want to Know What Love Is,” Bryan Adams’ “Everything I Do (I Do It for You),” and Dolly Parton’s “Here You Come Again.” The biggest surprise is that his cover of Mr. Mister’s “Broken Wings” is quite nice, helped along by an ethereal female backing singer. My general criticism of Clay Aiken continues to hold. He feels the need to over-sing everything. He’s less personality, more pomp.

All Is Well: Songs for Christmas 2006 ★

EP

All Is Well • The Christmas Waltz • My Grown-Up Christmas List • O Holy Night

An EP containing four overblown Christmas-themed ballads, apparently because the 2004 album didn’t do the requisite holiday damage. They’re not very good, but at least they’re relatively unknown songs. Michael W. Smith’s “All Is Well” is a dramatic dirge about Jesus, which Aiken over-sings so badly that the plastic Jesus outside your church might start wincing. Naturally, the orchestration swells like it thinks it’s in a Hollywood Christmas finale. Awful. The other three are the same thing, except technically they are different songs. “The Christmas Waltz,” originally recorded by Frank Sinatra in 1954, is so gleefully cheery here it practically vomits candy canes. Sinatra’s version, at least, didn’t have to fight its way through such a horrible fake orchestra. There are two other songs, but I think I’m done with this one.

On My Way Here 2008 ★½

On My Way Here • Ashes • Everything I Don't Need • Something About Us • Falling • Where I Draw the Line • The Real Me • Weight of the World • As Long as We're Here • Sacrificial Love • Grace of God • Lover All Alone

I’m starting to feel disgusted with myself for not completely trashing these Clay Aiken albums—especially this one. Not because I feel bad about doing it but because I am forcing myself to keep listening to them. The title track is why all the cool kids hate adult-contemporary. Terrible melody, unapologetically schlocky lyrics, and a vocal performance equivalent of a plug-in air freshener. That should have been enough for me to turn off the rest of the album, but then things look up when “Everything I Don’t Need” comes in. A hand-clapping ditty with a watery electric organ grooving underneath and vibrant female backing singers making little punches background. It sounds a little like Steely Dan if you wrung them out by the necks. Unfortunately, the other upbeat songs don’t rise to that. More forgettable things. A lot of sentimental ballads too, and Aiken isn’t exactly the sort of singer who commands my brain cells to attention. One nice thing I can say is that I kind of like the Celtic-ish stringed instrument noodling through the refrain of “As Long As We’re Here.” But that’s just me straining hard to cherry-pick nice things to say. He also seems to be flirting with CCM, with titles like “Sacrificial Love” and “Grace of God.” Trying to craft a rainbow love chain to the moral majority? Fight the good fight, my dude. You can never get anywhere with pessimism.

Playlist: The Very Best of Clay Aiken 2009 ★½

Compilation

Bridge Over Troubled Water • This Is the Night • Solitaire • I Survived You • Measure of a Man • Invisible • I Will Carry You • The Way • When You Say You Love Me • Shine • A Thousand Days • Without You • The Real Me • On My Way Here

I was hoping Clay Aiken might start growing on me if I sat through a straight run of what he and his fans consider his best songs. And… yeah… not happening. Maybe some of these songs would make decent background listening at a supermarket when I get tired of listening to all those beeps at the cash registers, but I can’t imagine that would last for very long. A non-album addition is a cover of Paul Simon’s “Bridge Over Troubled Water.” That booming choir almost swallows him up. Something I’d usually complain about, but maybe here I’d rather listen to the choir. Strangely enough, the B-side to that single, “This Is the Night,” manages to get some genuine lift going, even when it’s stuck with the standard adult-contemporary trappings. “Solitaire” was another non-album B-side, but this one is arranged with such purple seriousness that I’d think he was kidding if I didn’t know better.

Tried & True 2010 ★★★

Can't Take My Eyes Off You • What Kind of Fool Am I? • It's Impossible • Unchained Melody • Mack the Knife • Misty • Moon River • Solitaire • More • Chances Are • It's Only Make Believe • Who's Sorry Now? • Suspicious Minds • Crying

Based on how happy Aiken sounds here, I’m going to wager that he’d been wanting to make a record like this all along: a bubbly, orchestrated collection of standards from the ’50s and ’60s. I wouldn’t claim it’s an essential listen for anyone in particular, but I listened to it and managed to get quite a bit of enjoyment out of it. You wouldn’t notice from his murky adult-contemporary albums, but Aiken is actually a pretty fun singer. Given the right environment, he can be sunny, sweet, infectious, and even soulful. Maybe Frank Sinatra was right and this rock ‘n’ roll stuff was just a fad after all. Some of the songs here have been played to death by now—“Can’t Take My Eyes Off You,” “Mack the Knife,” “It’s Impossible,” “Unchained Melody,” “Moon River”—but I even like his takes on those. Most shockingly “Unchained Melody.” So played out, but the heavy string orchestration provides a thick layer of bloated melodrama. Again, not usually my thing, but then Aiken starts singing it and, ohhhhhhh. This funny little man actually sells it. Soulful, soaring, pleasant, passionate. All right, it’s official. As of today, I am a Claymate. My favorite is an especially sunny and infectious cover of Elvis Presley’s “Suspicious Minds.” Long live the King and all these happy young dudes.

Steadfast 2012 ★★½

Breaking Up Is Hard to Do • Everybody Loves Somebody • Misty • Crying • Bring Back My Love • Mack the Knife • It's Impossible • What Kind of Fool Am I? • Who's Sorry Now? • Suspicious Minds • Moon River • Unchained Melody • More • Can't Take My Eyes Off You

Gets dinged a half-star on account of being a rip-off. This is basically Tried & True again, except with a few new tracks: Neil Sedaka’s “Breaking Up Is Hard to Do,” Connie Francis’ “Who’s Sorry Now,” and an original, “Bring Back My Love.” The reason for even bothering to release this “new” album seems to be Aiken’s appearance on Celebrity Apprentice, which became the second major reality-TV show where he came in second place. I wish the jackass who hosted that show would have gotten in second place, too. Aiken would go onto getting second place in a Congress race too. I would have voted for him.

Christmas Bells Are Ringing 2024 ★★★

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year • Merry Christmas, Darling • Caroling, Caroling • Magic Moments • Wonderful Christmastime • Pure Imagination • Do You Hear What I Hear? • On This Silent Night • Ave Maria • All Year Long

We needed another Christmas album from Clay Aiken like you need a third Christmas tree in your living room—when the other two trees are on fire. But maybe someone finally wised up and made this one out of aluminum, because it’s actually pretty good. First, the 1950s-inspired album cover: Aiken with that cheery cocoa-chugging grin and that haircut, which AI informs me is called a tapered quiff. Sure. What a nice, clean-cut young man. Or I guess he’s middle aged now. So am I. He sings exactly like he looks on the cover. Bright, polite. He probably even scrubbed behind his ears that morning. Except the instrumentation is crisper than what you’d find on some generic ’50s nostalgia platter. Still with a little snap to it. Lots of the usual suspects here. “The Most Wonderful Time of the Year,” “Do You Hear What I Hear,” a surprisingly delightful rendition of Paul McCartney’s “Wonderful Christmastime.” Plus some songs I’m not familiar with. All good. Maybe the oddball is he reappropriates “Pure Imagination” from Willy Wonka as a Christmas song. Whatever. I’m here for it. Better than it being the Oompa Loompa song. Aiken’s vocals are unencumbered by too much processing, so when he sings the bejezus out of these songs, it doesn’t sound like all the soul has been vacuumed out of them. That’s why he sounded like doodie on the adult contemporary stuff. “On This Silent Night” almost turns into a medley: crescendoing woodwinds and strings. A textured church organ showing up in the middle. Really, champagne to whoever handled the production. I don’t know who you are, but if you’re reading this, go to the champagne store and charge all the finest champagne you can to your charge card. Drink up. But drink responsibly.